My cousin Maria

Today, I lay in bed battling the flu for the 6th day to be taken out of a short nap by receiving a call from my father bearing news that my dear cousin Maria has passed.

As I tried to gather my mental bearings, I tried to make sense of the news and asked for clarification as if I hoped I misunderstood what I was hearing only to realize that this nightmare was the worst kind in that I was awake and this news would not go away.

Maria was one of the brightest and warmest people I've ever known.  She was perhaps the most encouraging person I've known as well.  She had a way of staying connected while not imposing herself.  On Face book, always a "like" and an encouraging comment so that you knew she was reading and investing herself in your life.

For me, we had my dad's brother, Theo Christos who was bound to a wheel chair due to an unfortunate gun accident when he was a very young man.  I made it a point to visit him whenever I was home on leave from the Marine Corps and kept it up whenever I'd be in town.  She also faithfully visited him.  One time, she actually came out to California and visited us and stayed with us in our modest little condo.  We talked non stop the entire time she was there sharing a passion for business, and learning in general.  She saw I wanted to move from accounting into programming.  When she got back home, she sent me a huge box full of software, books, and all kinds of information about the field of programming.  More than the super generosity of this treasure she sent was the fact that SHE was THE treasure.  She provided me with the assurance that I could do it, I could make the career change.  Soon afterwords, I would leave California for Texas in 1994 to start my career and corporation in offering programming services.

She also had a passion for pictures and family.  She would be at family functions and she'd send out pictures from the event that had my family in them not even knowing we were being photographed.  Yep, that was Maria...  she loved the family from a point of view that you knew she was there and that she cared.  She was reserved and private and when you needed her, she would be there.

I must also say that I was the ring boy for her mom's wedding.  Her mother, Thea Georgia, knew I liked spaghetti and would faithfully cook it for me every time we'd visit her.  She was my favorite..  And then still, there was Thea Aremani (not sure of the spelling) her mom's sister, my aunt in Greece who worked morning, noon, and night to be the most amazing host.  I'll never forget when she grabbed the translation book I had to ask me if I would forget her when I would go back to the states... NEVER, NEVER, NEVER.  And, the brothers of her mom, Theo Tosh, Theo Pete.  Theo Tosh, one of the most generous men on the planet.  A very successful business man whose success was only bypassed by the help he provided to his workers and the community and Theo Pete, a quiet man, but determined and a hard worker that Theo Tosh could depend on for decades. 

What will our generation be remembered for?  Maria has started it.  Let us take the challenge to pick up where she led and care for each other and be kind and support each other as she did.  Much of what I am and have today was started with that box of goods she sent and more importantly, her encouragement and unwavering faith that she shared with me. 

I love you Maria, my dear cousin, and I wish I knew for I would have visited you when I was up there this Christmas.

New Year, change is in order

The change of year, a hope for new and better things and times.

I'm going to be all over the map here, so, bear with me:

Economics:

I must be frank, I'm rather tired of hearing about the economy and the fiscal cliff and what seems to be an unprecedented time in my life.  The call this, "the great recession".  I must agree.  Although, there is a technical definition for recession as being 2 consecutive quarters without growth in the GNP, the inability for workers to thrive is as I've never seen before.  I mean, I was around when America was THE place for manufacturing.  I even got my degree in Accounting and I distinctly remember thinking that I would probably never utilize my cost accounting skills and knowledge because of America moving to a service industry model.  I am a baby boomer.  It is rather bleak and unfortunate that as this generation approaches retirement, we're in the most technical age mankind has known, so, moving and re engineering is probably NOT a strong suit for an aging population who mostly has no pension and a terrible stock market experience.  Fact is, when you're a child and you cry for food, people are moved with empathy.  You MIGHT receive sympathy if you're gray haired and struggling to make ends meet.  I believe that the family must come together if we're going to thrive over the next 20 years.  Kids and parents may find an advantage to living together.  Shared resources help both sides and normally, the child outlives the parents and can continue with the assets shared without losing a step.  Perhaps the key is to view each other as "roommates".  So, when you're having YOUR friends over and it's 9:00 in the evening, ask them to be quiet because your roommates are sleeping.  The government is obviously not the answer.  If you think about it, they want to REDUCE social security and medicare, and they want to RAISE taxes.  So, spend less and increase revenues.  This would be a good household budget basic, reduce your spending and increase your revenue.  Historically, what we see is, they're very faithful at collecting the revenue, but, not so good at reducing the spending.  Alas, the saying, "death and taxes are inevitable", and so both will prevail.

Goals for 2013:

It's nice to have that fresh start feeling that a new year brings on.  Even if it only lasts for 20 days.  See, it takes 21 days to form a new habit and we probably fall short by one day.  But, for those 20 days, hope reigns.  This is a good thing.  Do you have a goal for 2013?  Share it, and ask someone to ask you about it 21 days later to see how you're doing.  I offer a couple of suggestions to the more probable goals:

1. Weight Loss - Take your time.  You didn't put it on in one day, one week, one month, and you'll not take it off in that short time either.  Normally, if weight appears to come off very quickly, it's more than likely water weight loss ... which comes back on just as fast as it came off.  There are plenty of sites on the web that will provide insights on how to get to your weight goal.  My personal conviction is this one point.  Whatever you do, get stronger.  Get weight training going if possible.  Ya, muscle weighs more than fat, but I'd rather weigh my weight and have reduced fat body percentage and have a solid muscle mass.  Also, try to find some regiment that helps you with balance.  As we age, we lose muscle mass and our balance is not as good as it once was.  Finally, my eating tip is to think in small reductions.  If you normally have a plate of food, then, reduce the plate to 90% of the food that was formerly piled on.  If you don't feel like you're cheating yourself, you're more likely to maintain your change.  Remember, Learning equals changed behavior.  (thanks Bruce Bullock for that insight)
2. Be a better person - To my Christian friends I say, spend time with him.  For, the love we receive from him we are responsible to share it with others.  To more of a cognetive approach, journalize your actions and find the root causes for behaviors that you don't like about yourself.  More than likely, you'll find that there may be a misunderstanding that you formed at an earlier time in life that if you approach it as an adult, you'll find a victory.
3. Do what you've always wanted to do - What are you waiting for???  There are no guarantees of a tomorrow.  All you have is now.  If you've always wanted to play guitar, piano, learn a language, etc...  do it.  Don't put it off.  I've found most everything I desire to do is available many times for free on the web.  And, if you're reading this blog, you're on the web :)

Sabrina & Gypsybleu:

We've undergone a change.  Robert Hansen has left the group for other pursuits and to continue to strenghten his family and work towards a continued effort of success in his new roles as a father and husband.  We miss him, and we do want God's very best for him. 

The band in 2013 is moving towards returning to its roots of working hard to learn new material, and even originals.  We enjoy the personal that remain.  Sabrina and I continue to have a great stage presence and I am so blessed to be with her on the stage.  Fernando has moved to front stage to provide a great passion playing experience that if you haven't seen it, you must come and see.  On bass, Silverio Garza plays most of our gigs and will move to the lead bass slot for the band.  Finally, one of the original pillars that remain is Greg Alexander, our faithful drummer.  We have opportunities due to growing relationships with radio station contacts and new clubs on the horizon.  We are tremendously grateful for our friends, fans, and people who enjoy us.  I can assure you of this one truth, without you, I'd be done playing.  Thanks for an awesome year.

My family:

Tomorrow, I leave for San Diego to see my son who will be graduating from Marine Corp boot camp on Friday.  My wife, daughter, and other son will be flying out together along with my in-laws.  This will be a very special time.  Having done my time in the Marine Corp, I totally understand the dynamic of being away from home and the joy of the reunion.  I am so excited that we will all experience this as a family.  It's so contagious that my brother Steve has flown in from Chicago to share this with us here in Texas.

Conclusion:

It's a good thing to feel hope and a new day.  One of my favorite biblical passages is from the prophet Jeremiah.  After having warned about the impending doom and judgment, although "right" in his warnings, he ends up in a dungeon.  You can read the story in the book of Lamentations in the old testament.  The verses that are so wonderful: 

Lamentations 3:19 - 23

Remembering mine affliction and my misery, the wormwood and the gall.
 My soul hath them still in remembrance, and is humbled in me.
 This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope.
 It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
 They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.